Meant to be
by thatgirlnobodynotices
Summary: It only took Lily 19 patrols and James' date with Teagan Hickley to realize she was completely and utterly in love with James Potter.


The bitter wind howled into the dark night, It could be heard from the inside of Hogwarts. Lily Evans loved the sound of it. She also enjoyed the sound of the thrashing rain hitting the window. She hugged her mug of hot chocolate close to her chest. She brought it up to her lips and took a loud sip, sighing contently when the steam warmed up her face and enjoyed the way the chocolate oozed down her throat, warming her from head to toes. It had been a long and tiring day for Lily. She'd only just come back from the summer and she was already getting lectured in class about the importance of N.E.W.T.S and how important it was to get the best results you possibly can. She inwardly rolled her eyes. (She was too polite to actually do it.) Like she didn't already know that. Lily was a hard worker; she was well known for spending her free time in the library long with Remus Lupin. They tested each other all the time, even on the stuff they knew that they already knew, because Merlin forbid if they just ended up forgetting any of it.

Lily had her 19th patrol since being Head Girl, with the insufferable James Potter. He wasn't the arrogant toerag Lily used to know though, it was a really strange and shocking experience for her when he actually stuck to what he said and 'took things seriously.' James has stopped asking Lily out in 6th year, (much to her relief) and now her and James were actually getting along. He was a better person than she'd ever even imagined. He was a complete gentleman, walking her to her classes and making her laugh. He was honest and kind and .. very different to the James she used to know.  
She likes this James much better, and she's glad he's changed. He still has his hair ruffling habit, but Lily didn't find it the most annoying thing in the world anymore. No, actually she found it kind of..well, _cute_. She didn't fully realize it yet, but Lily Evans had developed a crush on the raven haired boy.

She had the tell tale sign of crushes of course. Butterflies when he was around, getting nervous and blushing crimson whenever he gave her 'that look.' It was reserved for her and her only. So many girls hated Lily Evans. It wasn't because she was a bad person, oh no. When it came to being a bad person, Lily had very little faults. She always helped little first years to their classes or helped third years study.

Lily had always stood up for what was right, even if that meant standing alone. That's what James had told her one night in their Head's common room, when they were going through detention slips one late evening. Lily melted, and she knew from that moment that James Potter had well and truly changed. They hated her because she was the only girl who had ever captured the heart of the gorgeous James Potter, and she had ALWAYS turned him down.

It was the same night Lily had spilled everything about her home life to James. She had told him about how her mother was getting desperately ill,  
and how her sister hated her. She told him about the happier times of her childhood. Like all the family picnics in the meadow by the lake and how her and Tuney ran around together, working as a team to try and wrestle their father to the floor. They never won of course, as Joesph Evans could pick both girls up in one arm each, and dangle them over the lake until they were red in the face from laughter and screeching for mercy. Violet Evans would always tell her husband it was horrible to treat their little darlings in such an awful way and never to do it again, but the small smile that played on her lips went against every word that left her mouth. He had been patient with her whilst she had told him the story. He rubbed her arms soothingly when she stuttered and held her close when she sobbed, whispering gentle words of comfort into her ear.

Lily's thoughts were cut off when James himself entered their common room, his invisibility cloak stretched over his arms.  
Lily knew all about Remus' 'furry little problem' and what the rest of the Marauders did for him. When she found out she slapped both James and Sirius around the back of the head, before flinging her arms around both of their necks, telling them they were the most amazing and brave people she had ever met, it was no wonder that they were Gryffindors. James blushed and looked at the floor, muttering an almost silent thanks whilst Sirius smirked and replied: 'I knew you'd love us one day, Lilypetal.' He got another smack around the head for the stupid nickname.

She smiled at the thoughts and looked up at James, who had sat down in the chair next to her and was looking thoughtfully at the fire.  
'Are you okay, James?' She asked. He jerked out of his thoughts before flashing her a small smile but it didn't quite reach his eyes.  
'Oh yeah..yeah..sorry' He smiled. Lily knew there was something wrong. Her heart began to pound in her chest. She knew from the way he was squirming in his chair he wanted to say something, and she had a feeling she wasn't going to like what he was going to announce. Maybe it was another death eater attack. They were happening daily now. It was frightening and Lily knew that she was a target, being a muggle born, and she constantly worried about the safety of her parents. She owled them as often as she could, just making sure they were okay. James broke her from her thoughts again, but she was glad he did.. Kind of.

'I-I have a date tomorrow. And I'm really nervous. I haven't really being on a date before, since I chased after you since first year.'  
Lily could of swore her head sunk all the way into the depths of her stomach, and her stomach acid was attacking it. 'Well James, I-I'm glad you're moving on' Lies. 'Who's the lucky lady?' She forced herself to grin, it was so un-Lily like.

The way Lily had reacted seemed to calm James down immediately, and his usual grin was one again on his face.  
'Teagan Hickley, you know her?' He asked. She thought about it for a few seconds. Yes she did know Teagan. Her heart, if possible, sank down even further, the ache now strong and she couldn't ignore it.. It was in this very moment that Lily had knew she had fallen in love with James. She just knew it. It all make sense to her now. She was too late. She'd blown it. And it well and truly** SUCKED**.

Teagan Hickley was in quite a few of Lily's classes. She was undeniably _stunning_. Her long, silky, brown curly hair that stopped just as it reached her bum and she had round, big blue eyes. Her figure was _flawless_ and many, many guys fantasized about her. She was in many peoples opinion, perfect. Lily was happy and confident in her body, as she has her fair share of admirers too, but she had never envied somebody as much as she did in this moment. Suddenly feeling ill, Lily turned back to James.

'Yeah, I know her. I'm off to bed James, I'm so tired. If you've already gone by the time I've woken up, good luck and have fun. Night.'  
And with that, without even waiting for a reply, Lily scurried off to her room. She threw herself into her bed, and released her shaky sobs into her pillow. _Damn, why couldn't she have realized earlier?_

When Lily awoke the next morning, she instantly remembered today's events and her heart was once again thumping heavily against her chest. She turned her head and looked at the clock. 11.00am, not too bad them. The last carriages for Hogsmeade come at 10.30am. Lily didn't care, she didn't plan on going Hogsmeade today anyway. She couldn't stand the thought of seeing them together. She dragged her unwilling body to the bathroom and grimaced at her own reflection. Her eyes were bloodshot and slightly swollen from her tears. She turned her shower on and undressed herself, only stepping in when steam almost made it difficult to see anything in the room. She allowed her body to relax to the heat of the water. She knew today was going to drag.

Lily had spent a lot of the day moping around, refusing to tell anybody why she wasn't in Hogsmeade with the rest of her friends. She sat in the library with a book clenched tightly in her hands. She held the book close to her face, trying desperately to concentrate on the words.  
She was completely failing. She huffed angrily and threw her book down beside her. She was hoping that reading would get rid of her thoughts about James and 'his' Teagan. How wrong she was. Their stupid little date was the only thing she could think about.

What if he fell in love with her? What if he realized how much of a bitch she was to him and said he never wanted to talk to her again, and how Teagan was the only thing that mattered to him now. It was driving her crazy. She knew her last her thoughts were getting really pathetic but she couldn't help it. She felt incredibly guilty for thinking about it but she wanted their date to be completely awful, so bad that they'd never even look at each other again. She knew that wasn't going to happen. But oh how she _wished_.

Her thoughts went to James and James only. How had she never realised how..perfect he was before now? With his charming lob sided grin and his uncontrollable messy raven hair and his eyes, _Merlin_ his eyes. They were the most beautiful things she'd even seen.  
They were hazel with little specs of green in them. She could tell what mood she was in from only his eyes alone. When he was happy, they would light up and the green specs would twinkle. When he was angry his eyes were almost black, and when he was sad his little specs of green were hardly even noticeable. He was mainly happy, and the way his eyes twinkled took her breath away. He had quite the body, too. For once in her life Lily was actually thankful for Quiddich.

For what felt like the 298452934792th time this week, her thoughts were interrupted by a voice. 'Lily Flower! Why oh why aren't you in Hogsmeade?' Lily looked up to the familiar face of the one and only Sirius Black, who was leaning against the wall with his usual 'I can get whatever I want' smirk. Lily sighed and began to pack her bags.

She'd became really good friends with Sirius recently. Just like James, he was a really amazing person when you got to know him.  
However, she really couldn't deal with him today. 'No reason,' she mumbled, zipping her bag up. 'Don't lie to me Lilykins, I know the real reason,' He winked, 'Somebody has realized their undying love for another somebody and feels all mopey about it.' He winked again, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively at her. She stood up, feeling the anger bubble inside her. She didn't know how he'd found out, but she didn't care right now. How dare he mock her! She feels as bad as it is.

'Look Black,' She spat, her voice like venom, 'Don't you dare mock me, I feel like crap and the last thing I need are your jokes. I wish I had realized sooner, and yes, I have been oblivious to my own feelings but that gives you NO right to mock me and make a fool of me, regardless of how much of a bitch I've been to James.' ..She regretted the words as they left her much when she saw shock etched across every crease of Sirius' flawless face.  
She now realized he wasn't mocking her, and it was quite literally a joke. He didn't even realize she actually had feelings for James.

'Lily I didn't mean t-that.. I d-didn't know you..Oh Merlin Lil.. Wow.' He stopped himself before he made himself sound like a complete and utter idiot, although he was fairly sure he'd already done that. Lily felt her eyes stinging and she collapsed back down onto the sofa again, burying her face in her hands. She would not cry in front of Sirius Black. No. She felt an arm wrap around her small waist and then she just couldn't help it. _She cried._ She cried and cried and cried and spilled out all her feelings to Sirius. Much to Lily's surprise, Sirius was good at comforting people. Not as good as James though. She felt warm and all giddy inside when James held her, it felt right. Although Sirius' hugs were comforting, they were nothing compare to James'.

When Lily had finally calmed down, she looked up at Sirius. He smiled at her. 'Tell him Lily.' He said simply, looking her dead in the eye. 'W-what?! I can't just tell him I like him now. He'll get mad that I waited 'till he'd finally moved on and hate me forever. I can't do that to him, Sirius. I've been such a bitch to him already and I can't handle losing him. He's moved on and he's happy, I'll just have to learn to accept it.'  
Throughout Lily's whole little rant, Sirius was shaking his head at her. 'That's the thing Lily, he-he just hasn't.. Look, I can't tell you, I made a promise. Just promise me you'll talk to him? Please? For me?' He looked at her, almost pleading. She really didn't want to, but even **she** couldn't resist his puppy dog eyes. 'Oh alright, just stop looking at me like that!' She let out a small chuckle and he grinned at her before glancing at his watch. 'Oh Lily, Hogsmeade people should be back, I promised the lads I'd meet them..Are you sure you'll be okay?' He asked, his eyes full of concern. Lily had never felt so close to Sirius than she had in this moment. She smiled a genuine smile at him, she knew her and Sirius were going to get along very, very well.

'I'll be fine, I'm just gonna go and take a nap. I'll talk to James when I'm feeling a bit better. I promise.' And with that, she pulled him into a bear hug, which he gladly returned. 'Thank you Sirius.' She said. She sounded so genuine and sincere that Sirius could almost feel his eyes watering. He really liked Lily, he knew they were going to get along just fine. 'Anytime.' He replied. His grin returned to his face and he winked at her before turning in the opposite direction.  
'Wait, Sirius!' Lily called out, after remembering something. He spun to face her. 'Yeah?' He called. 'Why weren't you in Hogsmeade?' She questioned. He tapped his nose before throwing her another wink. She laughed and walked down to the Heads common room. 'Oh Sirius..'

Lily felt so much better after waking up from her nap. She was dreading talking to James, but she promised Sirius.  
She couldn't break it, she refused to. She pulled her knotty hair up into a ponytail and put on a bit of mascara and pulled herself down the stairs before she'd lost her confidence. She saw James sitting by the floor by the fire, staring off into space. Lily took a deep breath before sitting down next to him.  
'Hey!' She smiled brightly. He looked at her with that look again. It made her insides melt. A smile spread across his face. 'Lily, Hi!' He smiled back, but something was troubling him again.

'James tell me what's wrong. Don't you dare tell me there's nothing wrong because we both know there is. Was it your date? Oh god it is, what happened?' James chuckled a little and looked at her.'  
'The date went really well actually. Teagan's great, she's smart, funny and not to mention beautiful..' Lily felt her heart shatter. 'But she tried to kiss me and.. It just didn't feel right. I stopped her before she could. She threw a paddy and stormed off. I didn't know what was wrong with me.. everything was going really well. But then it hit me Lily..'

_Silence._ They both sat for what felt like an eternity, just staring intensely at one another, trying to read each others emotions. Until James finished his sentence.  
_'She's not you, Lily.'_ More silence. Lily's whole stomach was overloaded with butterflies. She felt weak. That was one of the most beautiful things anyone had ever said about her. She couldn't believe James Potter had said it. It was just so..surreal. 'I-I-wow.' She replied, not sure what to say. She could of slapped herself. Out of all the things she could of said, she replied with freaking 'wow'?!

'I know you don't feel that way about me Lil, Merlin do I know that. But I.. I can't get you out of my mind. I'm never going to feel this way about anyone else, ever. You're probably never going to want to talk to me again but-' She leaps up and connects their lips. She ran her hands through his hair and he responded by pulling her closer. His lips were the most amazing thing Lily had every felt. Their lips melted together as one, like they were made to fit together. After what felt like forever, they pulled apart. Lily learned her forehead against his. 'Lily..' He whispered. Their was so much love and warmth in his voice she wanted to pulled his lips straight back to hers. '_I love you_, James Potter.' She whispered back. The biggest smile she'd ever seen covered his face and she couldn't help but smile back. This was really happening. And _**damn did it feel good**_.

'Does this mean we're together?' He asked her, she couldn't help but see the hope in his eyes. She replied by kissing down to the crook of his neck and back up. Her heart skipped a beat when a small, pleasured whimper left his lips.  
**_Merlin_**, he was perfect.  
'Of course it does,' She whispered in his ear before she was pulled back in to another kiss.


End file.
